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为什么我们经常责怪他人

 


1.最近我重读了一本书,叫《事实》。其中最入心的提醒是那句话:“我们本能地把错误归咎他人,但最重要的是,坏事情发生时,应该寻找原因,而不是寻找坏人。

2.这句提醒,击中了几乎每个人的软肋,很多明白人也不能避免。毕竟我们生活在人类社会中,哪儿出了问题,第一反应是去找责任人。这样做有两个好处。
3.第一个好处是,我可能是解决不了问题,但我可以责怪一个责任人。这样就让我获得了对于世界的掌控感。第二,如果我还能证明这个责任人他就是个坏人,要么人品不行,要么智力不行,那我就不仅获得了掌控感,而且还能在什么都没做的情况下获得了胜利感。
4.所以你看,责怪人,是我们最容易获得一种解决问题的感觉,但是实际上又不用付出任何成本的方法。而真要去寻找事情发生的原因,解决问题,那就困难得多。

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