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小笑话

导师正在讲课，突然电话响了，他掏出来看了一下对我们说：“一般人的电话我是不接的，更何况是在上课，但这个人的电话对我来说很重要，我不能不接，请大家原谅一下。”然后，“喂，你好，我是×××……哦，你打错了！”


悟空和唐僧一起上某卫视非诚勿扰，悟空上台，２４盏灯全灭。理由：１.没房没车只有一根破棍。２.保镖职业危险。３.动不动打妖精，对女生不温柔。４.坐过牢，曾被压五指山下５００年。唐僧上台，哗！灯全亮。理由：１.公务员；２.皇上兄弟，后台最硬。３.精通梵文等外语。４.长得帅。５.最关键一点：有宝马！

某人带小狗到银行存款，小狗从不随地大小便，便前都会叫。正当他看报排队时，小狗汪汪直叫，只好将报纸铺在地上给它方便。存完款后，他一手抱着狗一手拿着包有狗便的报纸向银行外走去。突然一辆摩托冲出，抢走他手上的报纸包。他当时就惊呆了！众路人：真可怜！看，人都傻了，有四五万吧？


医生：“你有没有听我的建议，睡觉时将窗户打开？”病人：“有。”医生：“那么你的气喘完全不见了吧？”病人：“还在。但是我的手机、电视、笔记本电脑都不见了。”
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